الموضوع: A sound of violin

sound, violin

[align=center]A sound of a violin [/align]


[align=justify]It was along moment before I got off my bed. I spent a while of dead cold moments sensing everything around me. My cold sheets were embracing me gently, yet my bones ached in silent. Keeping my eyes closed, I heard the tick tick of my alarm on my right side. It sounded that nothing would stop waiting for me; the entire world was still going on and on. Suddenly, that quietness was broken by the gauzy curtains which were fluttering softly behind me. I turned my back …but I saw nothing. Yet, I felt the warmth of the sunshine all over the room. Finally, I got off my bed heavily leaning on my favorite rocking chair facing the large wide open window letting the breeze caressing my face gently. “Yeah, it was another new day”, I said to myself; but nothing new was waiting for me out their, nothing I want was waiting for me. These odd feelings had made me leave the room to prepare myself to go out.

Outside, the streets were, as usual, abounding with a handful of people and sounds of every kind. I stopped at my doorstep feeling the same common nagging fear inside of my beating heart. By a narrow margin, I was bold enough to step forward and lead the way ahead. It became a routine to go out every morning and walk till I got tired and then went beck home depressed, bored and upset. Few steps later, the aroma of the coffee aroused me; I realized that I was passing by the coffee shop “City Aroma” the favorite in the town. I stopped by to have one and drove myself out again, AGAIN to face the real world. I kept walking ahead to the unknown with no purpose, no dreams nothing but fear. I could feel people running on my both side. Some of them were talking together, some of them were laughing. “Sam! Get in the car…Sam!.You are late for your school”, a mother was screaming at her child, and some of them passed by silently and I could only follow the sounds of their footsteps. “Taxi.”, some of them was catching cars. The cars on my lift hand sounded very crowded and noisy. I could hear the sound of its horn; its doors opened and closed rashly every now and then and the sounds of its engines and brakes very clearly. The air was full of mixture of the exhaust and the smock of cigarettes from those who were coughing around me. Suddenly, something stroke against me. I stopped …confused …afraid…hesitant…what was this? Did I do something wrong? Shall I apology? Or shall I go on as if nothing has happened? I asked myself standing exactly where I was. “Oh, sorry Sir. Did you get hurt? My daughter was running and she didn’t notice you”, a women’s sound came. “No…no nothing happened . I am fine”, I replied. Immediately, I went on avoiding any other contact. Everything around me was going too too fast. Everyone was running knowing exactly were to go and when to stop. It seemed that everyone has his own full agenda and a lifetime in order to fulfill. For a moment, I felt that all of those people had different time than mine. Their watches seemed running fast and they were trying to catch up every second, but my watch had stopped ages ago; it wasn’t not the battery, it was me!

All of a sudden, every single movement around me settled dawn perfectly and it was nothing but the hush that filled the place. I stopped or may be I was frozen on one spot. I stopped and my ears and soul were anxious to hear more and more. It was only a sound. Ahhh…yes a sound from the past which made me cross far distance to take me five years back. That sound which I was living for made my heart beat all over again; my blood ran again in my veins. It was as common and familiar as that restless fear inside of my heart. At that very moment, my heart dived in my chest. From head to toe, I was wet with perspiration, my inside whole body was cold and shaking and my fingers cramped suddenly. I was about to run a way, I did not know why!! May be because of my past? Because of my pains? Because of whom I am? Or may be because of the reality or may be…may be…but I didn’t move an inch. I wanted to hear as much as I could. The sound was too painful too deep, yet there was a delicious bitter taste in it. That taste of my lost dreams and dark years melted together into that present moment. A filmstrip was wind backward in front of me it was very clear… very fresh. Just then and after five years, I played the part of the silent observer.

He was a twenty-four-year-young man who was driving his car too fast trying to catch up his test in the conservatory where he was taking a course in playing violin. At that day it was the last step “the test” but alas! It turned to be the last step of his dreams, hopes and of his entire life. He was charged with ambition and enthusiasm. He was a young man who wanted to shout letting his voice reach the remotest places in the world. Playing music was a window for his soul which he can travel through to lands that no one could reach or know about, where he had his own independent world. He just wanted to get there as soon as possible to prove to himself that he could do it and to accomplish one step of successes, one step of his youth dreams. It was raining hardly. The wipers of his car were of no effect. He kept gazing at the window concentrating so he might be able to avoid anything which may pop up suddenly. Everything was white in front of him. All the lanes were one at that day. He could hear nothing but the sound of the heavy rain surrounding him. Few minutes later, the car drew a way from the right lane going right and lift and the brakes didn’t work. He held the wheel strongly with both hands trying to control the car, when suddenly he was banged against a car.no it was not a car….it was a huge truck, no it was not a truck…actually he wasn’t not sure till that moment. Anyway, it was something big, solid and merciless. Things were broken and shuttering around him. Sever sounds of the unknown scene echoed loudly. Something was scattered and fell into pieces. He felt a deep awful pain in his whole body and he couldn’t tell where the pain was exactly. After a while, every low sound dropped. He couldn’t open his eyes, he couldn’t see anything, and he couldn’t make a movement. He tried but he failed…the pain was stronger than him. Bit by bit, his body lost all its senses and his limbs gradually were numbed and felt nothing after all….but he was sure that his heart kept beating and his chest kept breathing as well. At that moment he realized that he missed the test and all his dreams were gone with the wind. He could see his dreams scattered and broken everywhere around him just like his car…he wish he could do something but his power let him down at this moment; just then he lost his conscious.

“Hay young man, do you hear me? . If you do just press your right hand”, it was a sound of an old man that I heard. I thought I was dreaming till he repeated it again. I moved my head toward the unknown sound but it was dark…. I saw nothing. I did as I was ordered and pressed my hand slowly. “Thank God you are still alive son. Your survival was a miracle”, the sound came back again. With my ears I kept following the sounds around me trying to know where I was. Footsteps were going back and forth, doors were opening and closing from time to time and someone was drawing curtains. All of these movements and sounds were there but I saw none. The air smells full of detergent and medicine. On my both sides, I heard sounds of machines. On my right side, a person was scribbling on a sheet of paper. After a while, sounds left and quietness was replaced. I heard nothing but my unrest breathing which kept my chest rising up and down too fast. I turned my head right and lift hoping to see anything but it seemed I was surrounded by darkness. “For God’s sake where am I? What is all this darkness for?” I spoke to myself. I raised my hand heavily to reach my eyes to take off that mist. ¨Ah, No .¨, I whispered loudly. My shaking fingers felt gauze that was tiding my eyes. ¨He arrived to the hospital this morning, Dr. Jane¨…the same sound came back again. ¨It seemed a very horrible accident, is not it?” a new soft feminine sound interrupted. The former replied while I was lying there hopelessly and I wish he didn’t. ¨Yeah, definitely. I am afraid that his eyes will have to remain without feelings or may be feelings without sight´.

I opened my eyes wildly when I couldn’t bare the wound of that unforgettable moments and I realized I am still in front of that conservatory on the same spot. I sighed deeply listening, more than ever, to that familiar sound of the violins inside. It was a long road, I admitted it was, but I finally arrived. Just then, the floodgate opened and I sobbed in silent for all the losses, all the pains, all the dreams of youth, and all the disappointments life had inflected on me and made me blind from seeing the truth, the truth of who I was and how much I had to show and create and how much ambition I had to fulfill. That few silent moments broke the ice of all these dim five years. It opened my eyes to face a world which seemed to be full of new promises and opportunities and in the same time, it drove me to shut my eyes forever trying to roll off my back all the disappointments in my life. Meanwhile, I heard a sound, like a white lightening, but this time it was a sound coming from a distance deep in side of me, a sound that told me to go on and never to stop -what high the sticks were- and never look back again. Although sometimes it was difficult not to look back but I had to, so my life would not stop. I may look then, but not too often. I didn’t want to lose any more since I had lost a great deal. It was completely true. With all the wisdom of my twenty-nine- years, I realized that I could just begin all over again to meet the promises and opportunities ahead. I turned my back then to face a new way and ignore all those colorless days. I rushed back to my home with a new heart, a new attitude, new plans, and a new sight to the high places of brightness.





The end….
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I wrote this story last year. I hope U would like it

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A sound of violin